January 2020

For me, I was looking for a new start at the beginning of 2020. 

In December I had lost an uncle to cancer and a grandfather to complications after surgery just days apart from each other. I was still healing and trying to stay focused on my job and family. I was working at an exotic animal rescue, helping care for big cats and other animals in need of a safe haven. It was what I had always dreamed of doing, almost. I was one of the main tour guides for a number of years, bringing guests around the facility and educating them on the plight of many of our rescues as well as animals in the wild.

After a while of dealing with the public and doing the same thing over and over, sometimes it looses it's charm. The facility decided to change the way management was organized, bringing in someone new to be my boss. It's always hard when you know you have more experience in a certain area and then someone new comes in and disturbs everything. I know sometimes big changes need to happen in order for everything to run even smoother but it's always hard on those who were used to how things had been run for years! 

It may have been for the best of the organization as a whole, but I felt betrayed and belittled. Several of my coworkers felt the same, though none seemed to take it as hard. Within weeks of this transition happening, I had started think about leaving my position in hopes of finding something better and less stressful. 

You know you need a change when you wake up for work and already feel anxiety before you even go in. I don't normally feel anxious about much, but with everything going on, I was definitely feeling the stress. This same feeling had happened to me in 2016, the first time I had left the facility. The management had found a way for me to dislike being around the work I had once enjoyed.

This time around I also did not feel I was getting the respect I deserved for the knowledge I had collected over the years. Being told my "opinion didn't matter" in regards to a decision about an animal, that was the last straw, I knew I had to get out. On January 31st 2020 I walked away from my dream job and career.

I still hope to someday work around exotic animals again. One good friend I had worked closely with also left the following week. She had been in the same position as I had been and knew it was not healthy to work in that environment any longer.

https://www.publicdomainpictures.net/en/view-image.php?image=115715&picture=vintage-roller-skates-black

Not all was bad in January, I had decided to join Roller Derby, a sport long viewed as being violent and dangerous. After watching training videos and championships, my opinion had changed and I decided to give it a go. Yes, people can get hurt, but otherwise it's just a competitive sport like football or basketball. Teams trying to score points and outmatch their opponent to win. Considering I hadn't been on skates in over 15 years, it was fun to re-learn how to be on wheels. After weeks of practice, I felt more confident. 

I'll talk more about my experience in derby in my next post. For now, that pretty much wraps up how my January went. Stress at work, no work, and new adventures. Hope you stick around to read more about my journey when it gets posted.

Posts may be more frequent as I get caught up to current times. Once I'm up to date on events, I may branch out into other topics I feel strongly about. Hope I can keep this blog going. Wish me luck!